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How You Know Your Husband Is A Calvinist :- )

Received this from a dear sister in Christ. Enjoy :^ )

How you know your husband is a Calvinist:

1. He’d like to take you to church, but the nearest
church with “good theology” is 100 miles away.

2. You ask him for roses, but he only buys you TULIPs.

3. It gives him inordinate pleasure to choose a
lobster out of the tank.

4. He named your two daughters “Sovereign Joy” and
“Irresistible Grace.”

5. You light a candle and offer to read the Song of
Solomon out loud, but he’s more in the mood for
Romans…again.

6. He’s asked the elders at church to find a new name
for the “free-will offering”

7. When you first met him, he asked if your name was
Grace, since you were "so irresistable."

8. For your honeymoon, he suggests you go to
Wittenberg, Noyon, and Geneva, with s stopover in
Phoenix, AZ.

9. He always feels compelled to explain his usage of
the word "all" whenever he uses it.

10. He has a piece of paper in the back of his Bible
with the "problem verses" explained on it.

11. Not only does he believe the Doctrines of Grace,
he prays them!

12. You think you are going to Armenia on a mission
trip, but instead your husband takes you to the
nearest Wesleyan church to do some evangelizing.

13. He's a Christian who has honestly read his Bible
and believes the Word of God over the doctrines of
man.

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